I DON’T KNOW...

 

I don’t know how to belong myself.

I loose in the people for whom I open doors,

In the sights that I see with wide-open eyes,

In the sounds that shutter my ears...

In the silence, in the noise, in hope and in despair.

In the smell of a close touch,

I don’t know how to dance among wishes and dreams, mind and soul,

Good and wrong.

To run or stay?

To hide or seek?

I don’t know how to choose dark over light, hate over love,

I’m stuck between shades of white and black and grey,

Still learning to mix them up.

And when I feel the fire, I let it burn...

I use no cold water to get the ash.

I just allow life to happen...

Because this is how I grow,

I always rise from the ash and carry on...

To see the sunsets as new beginings and the good prevailing around.

The new chances as empty sheets of paper, ready to be filled up with letters in ink,

I usually throw myself deeply into the waters...

Even if they are calm or stormy,

I just catch the wawes and learn to swim.

But I don’t loose the joy of the travell,

I always have faith and...

Make notes to myself:

That heaven can be a place on earth...

With people not throwing stones but flowers...

Not judging and hurting themselves,

With no traps of the evil.

But good shining from the lighthouse through the fog.

Guiding us in troubled times.

But I do get lost sometimes as I wander among people and feelings.

I often sit myself in front of the mirror...

And with naked soul I see...

That I don’t know how to belong myself,

To stand in front of the people with safe fences,

Not whole.

To be and offer by half.

And when I do get lost, I find myself again

And start writing...

Cause I don’t know any proper treatment, just to CREATE!

Art is chaos taken shape. (Pablo Picasso)

R.O.X.